Words Dept.: category

it’s nothing compared to Penk’s recent stunt, in which he played Van Halen’s Jump after hearing that a woman had caused traffic “chaos” by threatening to jump off a bridge above the M60.

I feel like I’ve sat through both episodes of ITV1’s The Duchess on the Estate, an unimaginative piece of factual entertainment in which the Duchess of York spends some time on a housing estate in south Manchester and jabbers poshly for a couple of hours about “broken Britain”.
I haven’t, of course. But helpfully the BBC [...]

David Cameron’s sweary outburst on the radio this morning has the unmistakable hallmarks of a media strategy about it. In an attempt to sound “edgy” – and presumably because the Absolute Radio Breakfast Show hits the numbskull demographic that Cameron’s advisers want to hit this week - the 42-year-old, Eton-educated Tory leader was heard to say the word ”twat”. (Audio here.)
The whole thing – [...]

One of the most enlightening pieces of journalism re the Russell Brand/Jonathan Toss incident was when the BBC’s David Sillito solicited the views of people queuing to watch the filming of the Alan Titchmarsh Show and compared them with the views of people queuing to watch Never Mind the Buzzcocks. The former group (old people) [...]

Russell Brand and his pal Jonathan Toss have clearly touched a nerve over this whole “He fucked your granddaughter” business. But let’s get it into perspective. Why is Gordon Brown even thinking about this when real actual stuff is happening in the world? Aren’t we supposed to be on the verge of a global recession [...]

I felt disappointed this morning when I woke up and heard a panel of enthusiasts spouting off about the best way to cook roast potatoes and no mention of the imminent collapse of the global financial markets. I’ve become accustomed to talk of plunging share prices, billion-dollar bail-outs and Chancellor’s statements of a weekday morning. As such, the subsequent focus upon Powys [...]

It’s difficult to work out who’s the cheesier – Radio Norwich’s finest Alan Partridge or Oldham station 96.2 The Revolution’s Steve Penk.
The former presenter of ITV’s TV’s Naughtiest Blunders (before he was replaced by, er, a voiceover) Penk has just bought the Revolution, overturning its indie playlist overnight in favour of James Blunt and sparking [...]

If Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Wankbiscuit Johnson wins today, would the last person to leave London please turn out the light? (To paraphrase the Sun.) Obviously, it would help with the carbon footprint. Not that Boris knows what one of those is.
How come only Londoners get to vote, anyway? It’s my London too! I’ve been [...]

Can there be anything more depressing than the new British film Three and Out? I haven’t seen it, of course, because it’s shit. How do I know it’s shit if I haven’t seen it, you ask. Well, just look at the poster (I reply) – in fact, just look at the font used on the [...]

The rest of the media has joined in an extended reporting-as-gloating session over the out-of-court settlement that Express Newspapers agreed with Kate and Gerry McCann today. It has been top of the running order on news bulletins all day, with pundits queuing up to decry the coverage of Richard Desmond’s papers.
Nobody does schadenfraude better than [...]